Saturday, November 29, 2008


When I went to Kak Rabitah's room (my housemate with two brilliant daughters) last night, she asked me if I wanted to hear Athirah's story (that's her younger daughter. We call her Adik). I know Adik is very good at writing, she has read me really good poems that she made herself! I think that is so amazing.

So this was what happened.

That night Adik asked her mummy to make up a story for her but her mum said that she is not good at making up stories. Her mummy told her that God has given her the gift of Maths and Science, but when it comes to stories, her brain gets a bit dodgy and she will get stuck. Then Adik was asked if she could make up a story for her mummy, and here was hers (somewhat):

One day there was a flock of birds flapping their wings in the sky. But one bird just flapped his right wing only. His left wing was heavy and he did not want to use it. But one day, his right wing got hurt and it could not make any move. He packed and packed his right wing, trying hard to move it but he still couldn't. The other birds all ask him to "use your left wing, use your left wing" and he refused for a long time but then he could not stand it anymore and flapped his left wing. He found that he could fly higher with his left wing.

Kak Rabitah said she did not get it at first and asked, "so what?".

Adik said "it is about you mama. It is the moral of the story. You should use your literacy part of your brain and you might write wonderful stories with it."

It hit her mummy straight in the heart, and it hits me too, again and again. This is the third time I think I can burst into tears, thinking about Adik's story.

People cannot blame me if I really want at least a child in the future. A nice and clever one like Adik. Or like Adleen. Having just finished my rotation in Obs and Gynae did sometimes make me scared of the pain a woman might need to go through during the childbirth, but on second thought, it scares me more that when I sat in the fertility clinic, I saw a few couples who have been trying to conceive for years, but never been able to get pregnant. And it makes me sad sitting in the gynae clinic to see people coming in, requesting to terminate a pregnancy.

Me, Kak Rabitah, Adik and Adleen

Anyway, that is not what I am trying to get to.

The point is I learn a lot from Adik or Adleen even when they are still so young, being just 7 and 11. And of course I learn from everyONE else around me too. I agree with Kak Rabitah that Adik is so truly magnificent, I can hardly wait to see how she is going to use the gift that Allah has given her. Although on the other hand, I think she grows up too fast and I want her to stay cute as she always is now, but hey, time flies really quick you know. May Allah always guide her to the right path. Who am I to be proud of her, but I always am.

This reminds me of a movie called 'Horton hears a who' - a person is still a person no matter how small they are. Kids can really give great impact on your life, trust me.

I love you, Adik. I love you. I love you.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008


Have you ever had a time when you have so much things to do at the back of your mind that you spent so much time working out what other tasks were ahead of you and which ones should you complete first? You spent time planning, yet, because there were just too many things in your mind, never were you able to complete those tasks.

I have had those moments. And sometimes I ended up updating this blog, and that is what I am currently doing. Hehe. Get to work Iffa!

Oh yes. Just wanting to share this: I am going back to Newcastle for good (before going back to Malaysia for good) this coming Friday! But Obs and Gynae assessment is freaking me out at this very moment.

So should I say this again. Doing things changes things. Not doing things leaves them exactly where they are. So go back to work Iffa! Or go to sleep and get a fresh start tomorrow morning.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

FW: Etiquettes on E-mail Correspondences to JPA London

To All JPA Sponsored students,

We are now in evolving technological space where technology rules almost every aspect of our lives. Most notable and touching of all is the communication sector and, today, I would like to focus specifically on e-mail correspondences.

Daily, JPA London receives between 30 – 80 e-mails, plus dozens of snail mails. E-mails now are increasingly becoming ‘official’, just as mine now to you. However, we have received many e-mails with many shortcomings, with some lacking its status. If you would like us to read and treat your e-mail with its due respect, you must also present it with the proper protocols.

Although very simple, let us remind ourselves again on the above subject.

A. Title – Please put a title to your e-mail that represents the likely subject matter. With the number of e-mails received daily, we will ignore untitled e-mails for worry of virus, worms, etc.

B. Salutation – Please refer us with kinder words and not just “Hi” or Hi there”. Use prefixes such as Mr / En / Tuan / Puan / Cik / Ms / Miss / Sir or Madam. We DO NOT advocate the use of “abang” or “kakak” for its lack of official ness. If you are writing to private e-mails, then the choice is yours but and are official e-mail addresses. If you are unsure as to the officer-in-charge, just write “Dear Sir / Madam”. Please also refer us by our name as we normally do as Malaysians. Unless you are now a real true blue British to the tee, there is no Mr. Rahman or Ms. Zamani or Ms. Ariff in this office. We don’t have the practice of surnames in our culture. Don’t be rude.

C. Content – Please write in full and clear sentences. You can use either English or BM in your e-mail to us. What we will not tolerate is abbreviated words in e-mails, as what you’d normally use in SMSes. Examples are “r u” or “ x pe” or “b4” or “y ct n g x plaks nk cum 2 c u @ bs“ ori 1 2 c u @ p g da”. We don’t understand these and we will not try to assume to understand it also. We will totally ignore, from now, e-mails written in such. So, please make sure you write clearly what you want us to read.

D. Signing-off – It doesn’t hurt a bit to say “Thank you” before you sign off. That’s good mannerism, which we believe you have been taught by your school / parents. Please give them some justice and honor. For those with family names, please also write your name as you normally write them in Malaysia as your records are written in the same. For example, it’s “Yap Ah Loy” not “Ah Loy, Yap ”. Please also write your IC, major and university so that we do not have to cross refer your name every time we receive your e-mail. With your e-mail address with names like “angels”, “death”, “Satan”, “handsome”, “baby”, etc, we need everyone to sign-off with their recognizable name.

PLEASE TAKE NOTE that we will forthwith put on low priority or will totally ignore e-mails that do not conform to the above minimum etiquette.

Thank you.

Kind regards,

Adib Rahman

JPA London

Sunday, November 09, 2008

FP 2009: Application deadline has passed

Please note that the deadline for submitting applications for FP 2009 has now passed.

You did not submit an application and therefore will not be considered for a foundation training place in the national recruitment round.


The UK Foundation Programme Office

I was happy not to apply for F1 job in the UK until I read this email. I have to say there was a rush of weird feeling inside me as I read through this short email. It feels like being rejected. But who cares.... I was the one who made that call. I finally made my decision. And I still am happy with that, honestly.

Yes, finally that was done. Thanks to everyone who discussed with me their thought during the process.

Start packing. I am going back, yeay!

Monday, November 03, 2008


Ok. So I still have not come up with proper answers for my foundation application. Instead I am concentrating on deciding whether I really want to work here if I get the place, in which case, I will - if I apply. But why bother answering those sickening questions if I really want to go back now. It is just being paranoid of the regret I might get later (if I dont apply at all) that makes me struggle with the questions. But, will it not be counted as an effort to fill up the form at least? Another example of the THIN lines in my life. Eeeeeee geramnye.


I got three pairs of new baju kurung (baju raya) from my mom in summer.
She said "takpelah banyok2 pon, next year nok buat sahhang (pakai) pergi keje kan".
A hint that she wanting me to work in Malaysia.

Papa asked me to buy a car for him and bring it back next year.
And I said "doh tu kalu pah keje sane guane? mestila pah nok gune kereta".
And he exchanged that look with my mom. Mama smiled. Hehehehe naughty me.
But again, he was expecting me to go back.

But after a long argument of the reasons why I will stay for a while, if I want to stay (which I was still 50-50 at that time), they seem to not have any preference.

When I told my younger brother who is now studying accounting in Warwick that I will put Coventry and warwick deanery as my first choice for the application, he said:
"Bagusla. Senang nanti kalu aku takdok duit"
Hehe, ade ke. That is definitely not the reason I want to go closer to you. Hahah, too bad.

I asked this matter to my sister who is studying A level in UCSI, looking forward to further her study in Pharmacy in the UK in the next 2 years. She said "keje la kat UK, tunggu aku gi sane". Haha, semua orang pon die nak suh duk ngan dia. Anak bongsu!

I chatted with my bro this afternoon.
iffa: bile mung nok gi umoh abg
iffa: bowok la web cam
iffa: rindu la ke mia
we: dok tau lg
we: eheh
we: td die pandai doh duk main wak lolok tgh mekap
we: pahtu die kate die comel
iffa: amboi
iffa: hahahaha
iffa: mia omel
we: klako la'
iffa: hih nih nok blk msia ni
iffa: oo baru ignat
iffa: nok tanye mung rse
iffa: baik aku kije sini dulu ke
iffa: balik kije msia terus
we: hurmm
we: aku dok reti ngat mende gini
we: huhu
we: opinion aku la
we: molek doh kalu mung balik pon
we: tp mung mitok spital trg la
we: buleh teman mama nga papa dumoh
we: heheh there's a reason. And Damia is another.

That was family.

I just knew a friend who changed his mind to go back when he was the one person was really firm about wanting to work here.


I just rang my brother in Warwick, as I think the only reason I will want to stay here is him. I am sure he will be fine here, it is not like I have to babysit him. I never did in fact. The way I talked to him just now really sounded like I want to go home, for sure. I just wanted him to acknowledge me not applying at all. "takpe eh kalu aku dok isi borang?". "aku nok wat guane kalu mung dok isi. gitu je la". Eee sedih la plak. Siap suruh kahwin kat UK haha. And he said he is going to force me going back to Malaysia if I later will be reluctant to go back for good.

That is my fear. What if I do not want to come back after all? I know I promise myself to give me only 2 years here, but what if I won't? I am very comfortable with UK system. Everything here is easy. Everyone here is nice. And I can still help with the dakwah here. There are so little chances of not living in wealth here. But is that all that I need? I am sure I will be fine wherever I am going to work. I am sure I will learn a lot working here for the first two years (not practical wise though - Malaysia is definitely better for hands-on experience!). But what if I do not want to come back after all?

Yes, I know it is me who will make the call. It's just that I still need a very valid reason for me to stay here, or otherwise. Please please please. Let it come across my mind.

p/s: Huhuh... Malasnye nak isi borang. In the end, tak apply jugak ni. Sorry to make this a big deal. I am just...thinking.

Saturday, November 01, 2008


S - I found answering the questions for my foundation school application and not yet knowing where I am planning to work right after graduation is really stressing me up. Although I am more inclined of going back to home to start working as a busy house officer at time, who knows it might change. So I decided to fill it up anyway, you know, just in case I change my mind.

T - I have read through the questions and been to the workshop in Carlisle, but I am still struggling with the questions. I have sat in front of this computer a few times, trying to start answering at least one questions, but I haven't answered one properly yet.

A - I felt so stressed that out of no reasons, I am craving for karipap. SoI went out to Morrison's and bought sardine and flour so I can make them, and I also bought a new ice cream - a flavour that will soon be in my next shopping list, insyaAllah.

R - In reflection, I found out eating is a good way to cope with stress. Cooking is a good way too, in addition to my traditional way of coping with stress (some sort of DSH but it doesn't harm me at all). And more importantly to always try, and pray to Allah so that I will keep trying for the best. Convinced that whatever happen next is the best for you and everyone, but try your best, do whatever you have to do at time.

R - And finding out how I cope with stress will definitely help me as a foundation doctor later on, as I anticipate my next two years will be very busy and full of stress. I reckon if I work under stress I will become less a person of who I am, and I will not be a good doctor.

All the best to those applying for foundation school next year!

p/s This is not a good example of answering the question.

Friday, October 24, 2008


If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you.
But you be honest anyway.

What you spent years building, someone could destroy it overnight.
But you build anyway.

If you find happiness, they maybe jealous.
But you be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow.
But you do good anyway.

You see in the final analysis, it is between you and Allah.
It was never between you and them anyway.

Have a meaningful friday.

*credits to Madihah for the Friday text message.

Thursday, October 23, 2008


I might have a thousand and one complaints I would want to tell, but having been here for the past 5 days so far, there are of course the good things of being here in Whitehaven. Well, I get an accommodation to stay so at least I do not have to travel much - only in weekends at least. Although the road to get here was terrible. Well maybe it was the horrible weather last Sunday as well that made driving so difficult. It was raining the whole journey once I passed Hexham. 50 mph and I felt the car was nearly blown away already. It took me 3 hours to get here. Thankfully the hospital was clearly signposted so I did not have troubles finding it in the town (it is actually out of town). Just imagine if they do not provide accommodation here...

And, the view outside my window is breathtaking. Well, it is very near to Lake District anyway - a doctor was saying its 25 mins drive to Keswick - I have been there and it's gorgeous but it won't be if I do not spend it with good friends of mine. By the way, the picture above is the view from my window which is not too nice because the window could not be open wide enough for the camera to go out. The room is quite small (which I do not really mind). I guess people who phoned me in the past 4 days know what I am not so keen about living here. I am not going to pour them into this entry. Except one thing, my room heater is not working and it is extremely cold here. I am now in fact listening to the wind whistling against the window. I have not been sleeping well since I got here. It is freeeeeezing.

It makes me homeNEWCASTLEsick (although the weather would be more or less the same, I suppose) and homeMALAYSIAsick every time I think about it. Well, at least I now have internet connection - that will keep me busy. I really need it particularly in these couple of weeks especially for my elective report and for the foundation school application. Stress!!!!

One more brownie point - the staff here are friendly, as those in Carlisle. Although I must say the last session today was daunting.

Talk about good things Iffa.

Dila my exhousemate has gone back to Malaysia for good. I remember upon arrival to Newcastle first time in 2004, I was sent to 41 Brighton Grove (where I used to live), and Dila was the one who opened the door for me. I seriously thought she was a senior, all the memories are coming back to me really clearly now. I think I will miss her really sweet text messages the most.

The former 196 + Athirah

To Dila, all the best in whatever you do. Keep being nice, warm and sweet. And keep doing the right thing even though it might be hard to do so. Please do not change for worse the next time I see you as I anticipate a really big battle for you to go against in Malaysia. Make sure you have someone to always remind you and guide you to the right path.

May Allah bless u (and me too).

Wednesday, October 08, 2008


Last updated at 1:36 AM on 08th October 2008

Treating a burn with honey from the kitchen cupboard may promote faster healing than a surgical dressing. Honey has been found to be better at aiding burn recovery than standard treatments used by the NHS, a study claims.

Scientists pooled data from 19 trials involving more than 2,500 patients with a range of wounds. They found that honey was better at reducing the time it takes to recover from mild to moderate burns than some widely used gauze and film dressings. 'We're treating these results with caution, but it looks like honey can help speed up healing in some burns,' said chief researcher Dr Andrew Jull, from the University of Auckland, New Zealand.

How honey works is unclear, but it appears to fight infection and help the body remove dead tissue. The findings were published by the Cochrane Library, which provides systematic reviews of research studies. Honey was revered by the ancient Greeks and Egyptians as a medicinal agent for burns and sores. Scientists are also working on ways to use honey in the fight against superbug MRSA. Tests in Belfast City Hospital have shown that it can kill the bacteria in the lab. Clinical trials are planned to see on patients.

Sweet: Treating a burn with honey could promote healing faster than a surgical dressing
Both the holy Qur'an and Hadith refer to honey as a healer of disease.

'And thy Lord taught the bee to build its cells in hills, on trees and in (men's) habitations..... there issues from within their bodies a drink of varying colours, wherein is healing for mankind. Verily in this is a Sign for those who give thought'.(Translation of Quran 16:68-69)

In addition, the Prophet (PBUH) said:

'Honey is a remedy for every illness and the Qur'an is a remedy for all illness of the mind, therefore I recommend to you both remedies, the Qur'an and honey.'(Bukhari)

Friday, September 19, 2008


So I am about to finish the second week of my 1st senior rotation, which is the mental health rotation, or simply known as psychiatry. I am not feeling well at the moment, still having this unresolved cough for ages - it might be due to my 'unhealthy' eating, hahah I think lots of future doctors or even doctors are lacking this good drive!

Anyway, I was part of the crisis team today - what we did was we went to see people who are at high risk of committing suicide, had some chat and hopefully they will see positive things coming out of the future. It was not a good day. I could barely stop coughing during the consultations, and it got worse in the afternoon, so I just slept all the way to the different houses we went to. I pity the social worker who I went with. Hope I did not cause so much trouble just now.

I do not like mental health that much to be honest, but I think it has been alright here in Carlisle. Almost everything is well organised so far. Although I have not seen a lot of patients but I got the chance to see at least one with different presentations, which is good. Honestly, I feel so sorry for these people, and it struck me how actually sane and lucky I am. The care for them here is first class I would say. I wonder how the situation is back in Malaysia.

Hmm, back to me and Carlisle, I am given this accommodation here which looks more like a hotel room to me really. But despite all these good things happening here, I am longing to go back and work in Malaysia. That's it. That is my decision. (may be for now at least, I just kept changing my view every day to be frank, and it frightens me a lot that I keep thinking about it - it means the finals is very near!). And I can hardly wait for Fridays to come so I can go back to Newcastle, break the fast together with others who were also fasting then do the prayers together. I am so accustomed to these that it feels so weird to go through Ramadhan without them.

And tomorrow will be Friday, yeay! ***lama tak dapat friday text dari madihah*** you know, Friday is a special day for Muslims (as Saturday for Jews, and Sunday for Christians).

Just a food for thought. If you think you are unfortunate enough, read this news. I just spent 3 pounds for my bus day rider ticket yesterday, and 23 people would have actually died for it! I once heard there are lots of us who are really patient, but yet very little of us who are grateful to Him. May we all belong in both groups.

Thursday, August 28, 2008


It has been so long since the last time the seven of us are together in a photo. Finally, after a long argument whether all should be sending me at the airport that night (it meant we need 2 cars then), here you go... a photo of all of us in family (and including young cute adorable little Damia!). It is not a good one, but it is good because we are all in it.

Oh my god, Damia is SO cute, you should all see her videos, especially when she starts to pretend reciting the Quran or anything with Jawi writing on the paper. At least she pronounces Allah very clearly when she does the recitation. She really IS gorgeous, apart from her moody swings, but who doesn't... I miss her so much already.

Coming back to Newcastle this year is a lot different from years before. A smaller part is that it was my first time travelling back to the UK not on my own. And the biggest part is because it is going to be our final year, and I am gonna be sent away from the rest, and I dont know whether I can depend on them to study together again. As it has always been. It is scary, but I wont let that bother me now. And it is scary while on the way, we were talking about working as doctors already. Be it in the UK or in Malaysia.

Another thing that makes it different this year is that my brother is joining me in the UK next month although he's gonna be down south in Warwick... so yes, I will see you if not in Warwick, you will come up to Newcastle hahaha.

Monday, July 28, 2008


Sejak balik Malaysia ni, bermacam-macam berita yang timbul. Bermula dengan isu minyak yang sememangnya dah kedengaran sejak sebelum balik ke Malaysia lagi, sehinggalah hari ini, isu tentang muzakarah UMNO dan PAS. Yang pasti, banyaknya tentang isu politik di Malaysia. Sejak pilihanraya umum ke 12 lagi, isu politik di Malaysia bagi saya tidak pernah senyap. Ada saja berita baru yang timbul. Bagi saya yang kadang-kadang baca, kadang-kadang tak baca sangat, bergantung kepada wujudnya fasiliti internet, suratkhabar di perpustakaan, dan lain-lain media massa di mana saya menetap buat sementara waktu ini, saya dapati isu-isu ini timbul sekejap sahaja dan kemudiannya tenggelam dengan isu yang baru pula. Mungkin disebabkan media massa selalu bertumpu kepada isu baru jadi isu itu sahaja yang menjadi tumpuan, saya tak tahulah.

Terbaru tentang isu muzakarah UMNO dan PAS. Kadang-kadang rasa jemu membaca berita sebab tak tahu kesahihannya. Yang sini kata lain, yang sana kata lain.

1. Utusan Malaysia: DAP selar PAS kerana berunding dengan UMNO atas nama perpaduan Melayu

2. Parti baru bertunjang Islam boleh satukan PAS, UMNO - Nik Aziz

Dengar tajuk memang macam mengiyakan satu sama lain, tapi bila baca macam ada yang berbeza. Persoalannya, samakah Melayu dengan Islam? Memang setahu saya orang Melayu di Malaysia semuanya (sepatutnya, by right) beragama Islam. Tapi betul ke? Bila isu murtad diheboh-hebohkan suatu masa dulu (sekarang pun pastinya masih wujud, cuma bukan di page pertama media massa), berapa ramai Melayu yang murtad? Jadi semua orang Melayu beragama Islamkah? Dan yang beragama Islam berapa kerat yang mahu Islam tu naik?

Islam dan bukan Islam, bagi saya seorang yang beragama Islam, memang tidak sama kerana di dalam al-Quran sendiri Allah telah challenge dan tanya bukan sahaja perbezaan orang Islam dengan orang bukan Islam, malah dibezakan orang yang beriman dan tidak beriman. Saya pasti bagi seseorang yang beragama kristian/lain-lain mereka yang betul-betul yakin bahawa agama mereka adalah benar, merasakan bahawa mereka adalah tinggi di sisi tuhan yang mereka percayai (yang mana bagi saya, Allah jugalah satu-satunya tuhan sekalian makhluk). Juga berdasarkan ilmu cetek saya, Islam ini adalah adil, maka layanan yang perlu diberikan adalah sama. Tidak kira bangsa, tidak kira agama.

Entahlah. Mungkin inilah sebabnya sekolah medikal di universiti saya agak menekankan tentang literature review. Kumpul segala maklumat yang ada, dan berfikir dengan kritikal dan waras. Juga perlu berteraskan wahyu, bukan setakat logik sahaja. KBKK yang digalakkan di sekolah-sekolah di Malaysia juga memang sangat perlu. Harap-harap dapat melahirkan kemahiran berfikir yang baik di kalangan generasi masa depan...insyaAllah.

p/s: rasa banyak nak cerita pasal buat elektif kat sini tapi lain kali pulak...

Monday, July 14, 2008


Perhaps too last minute for this year's, but it is a yearly event, so if you are flying to further your studies in UK/Eire (especially) next year, wait for it in about a year time. Hopefully there will still be one in the coming years too.

As for this year, it is worth trying still...who knows there are still vacancies. Click on the poster below for more information.

Monday, June 09, 2008


I was looking forward to have my elective in my home country, and it is my first day today. I anticipated it to be quite scary, but it was not that bad. I'd say (for the first day) it is almost the same as my SSC. You could just do anything you want. I met 2 of my schoolmates today. One is doing elective too, and another has just started her housemanship 6 days ago.

While waiting for my mum to pick me up (duh, need to pass another private driving test with me mum before I can drive again), there was a person asking a taxi driver how much it would cost to bring her family to Manir (that is about 10-15 minutes from HKT - more or less) and I was not looking at them at this time.

The girl: Pokcik, berape tambang nok gi Manir?
Taxi driver: Dalam 20 riya.
(I assumed the girl then went to get her family. Later, there were a few people waiting at the booth with me)
Me: Mahal gok eh pokcik tambang nok gi Manir. 20 riya. Sebab minyok naik harge ke pokcik?
Pakcik: Ho (muke macam nak taknak jawab). Adik duk mane?
Me: Kuale Iba (Ibai)
Pakcik: Hooo... tuh dalam 10 riya ah. Kalu masuk dalam sket 15 riya.

Me: (Alamak. Ingatkan ni ayah akak tu ie passenger to be, rupenye taxi driver!!!)

Hahaha...lain kali jangan pandai-pandai je tegur orang. Suka hati je.

The point is, yes, I am back in Malaysia. Hopefully another 11 weeks won't go too quick. Oh, and the news is all about the rise in fuel price. ***Ubah gaya hidup?***

Tuesday, May 20, 2008


1. Count every F in the following text (on the first read through):


2. Open a word document and type:

=rand (200,99)

Press enter and wait for few seconds.

3. So what is it with "the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog"? (hint: try counting how many letters it has).

I once asked a patient to write me down a sentence when I was assessing his MMSE (mini mental state examination), and he wrote that down and asked me, what is special about it. Man, he definitely was well orientated. More than I did!

Thursday, May 15, 2008


I attended OSCE revision for finals (4th and 3rd year were invited too) which was generously done by a senior lecturer here - I can't believe in a year time, I will be sitting in the same lecture theatre (probably) for the similar revision, just two weeks away from the final exams. The message I got from the revision is how little I know my stuff - I seriously need to catch up. One year seems so far away, and I know it is ridiculous to start panicking now, but I just did - a while ago - coz I couldn't even remember which ones the Heberden's and Bouchard's nodes were. But that was then. Hehe. Panicking early is good though, I think.

Anyway. I am back to this small empty room in Middlesbrough and am finding something useful to do to keep me awake while waiting for Fajr prayer. I was reading my email - a Malaysian here is suspected to have thalassaemia here. Since I have very limited things to say when being asked about it, I chose to review this topic for this midnight entry, but I am going to do it in Malay language instead - guess it will be a good practise since I am less than a month ahead of my elective in the hometown!

What's more, I have learned that when you have to do some teachings you tend to understand and memorise more about the lesson you teach. And research suggests that who do not carry out review may forget 75% of the material in a week, and 98% in under 3 weeks, meaning that you are virtually starting from scratch at revision time [Newcastle med school study skills handbook]. So here you go. Bare with the language - not good in English, not even good with Malay, bak kata Ustaz Hasrizal akhirnya jadik orang yang tak reti berbahasa. Duh! Nak buat guane.

Apa itu anemia?

Anemia ialah penyakit kurang sel darah merah atau hemoglobin (bahan yang bertanggungjawab membawa oksigen dalam darah dan memberi kaler merah pada sel darah merah). Jika anda kurang sel darah merah atau hemoglobin, maksudnya tisu badan anda tidak mendapat oksigen yang optimum maka anda akan merasa cepat penat dan lesu. Kadang-kadang sebab kurang oksigen, anda mungkin kelihatan pucat. Dan kadang-kadang juga, pesakit anemia mempunyai masalah sesak nafas kerana cuba bernafas lebih banyak atau cepat untuk menyedut lebih oksigen sebagai respon kepada kurangnya oksigen dalam tubuh. Jika kronik, limpa anda boleh bengkak dan ini dapat dirasa apabila pemeriksaan abdomen dilakukan.

Apa yang sebabkan anemia?

Fikir 3 cara, iaitu masalah dengan:

1. Proses menghasilkan sel darah merah/ hemoglobin - terlalu kurang/perlahan

2. Proses memusnahkan sel darah merah - terlalu cepat/banyak

3. Kehilangan darah secara langsung contohnya berdarah banyak dalam kemalangan jalan raya

Talasemia adalah contoh di mana proses memusnahkan sel darah merah adalah pada kadar yang tinggi kerana fisiologi (?bentuk) sel darah merah yang dihasilkan adalah tidak normal maka limpa dengan cepat mengesan ini dan cuba memusnahkan sel yang tidak patut wujud dalam badan pesakit. Penyakit ini digolongkan dalam hemolitik anemia (hemolitik = pemusnahan hemoglobin/sel darah merah).

Apa itu talasemia?

Talasemia ialah satu jenis penyakit anemia (kurang darah merah) yang merupakan penyakit keturunan. Ia biasa dijumpai di Mediterranean, India dan Asia Tenggara, termasuklah Malaysia. Banyak mana peratus populasi yang menghidap penyakit ini di Malaysia tidak dapat saya cari, cuma saya pernah dengar yang ianya memang biasa dijumpai di Malaysia.
Ada 2 jenis talasemia yang biasa dijumpai. 1. Talasemia alpha 2. Talasemia beta

Adakah anda pembawa gen talasemia?

Ini memang tak boleh dijawab melainkan anda mengambil ujian untuk cek sama ada anda tergolong dalam pembawa gen ini atau tidak.

Bagaimana dengan anak anda?

Jika kedua-dua ibu dan bapa mempunyai satu gen (daripada dua), maka ada kemungkinan untuk diwariskan kepada anak. Jika anak menerima satu gen tersebut dari bapa dan satu gen dari ibu, maka akan menghidap talasemia. Jika anda dan pasangan tidak mempunyai simptom dan tidak tahu anda adalah pembawa, situasi yang paling tidak diingini ialah jika kedua-duanya pembawa gen. Dalam situasi ini, ada kebarangkalian untuk anak anda mendapat talasemia ialah 25%.

Bagaimana mengawal/mengubati talasemia?

1. Pemindahan darah (seumur hidup) jika anda menghidapi talasemia beta major - ini mungkin disusuli dengan suntikan sejenis bahan untuk membuang lebihan ferum dalam darah akibat darah berlebihan yang diterima dari pemindahan darah. Suntikan ini biasanya dijalankan 3-6 malam seminggu.

2. Pembedahan untuk membuang limpa

3. Pemindahan sumsum tulang - curative tapi bukan senang untuk cari yang sesuai
Jika minor dan tiada simptom atau masalah, maka tiada rawatan diberikan.

Perlu ingat bahawa setiap individu adalah unik maka perlu dirawat secara individu.Oleh itu, bagaimana anda dirawat atau di'manage' akhirnya adalah tertakluk kepada pakar darah yang merawat anda.

Please correct any misinformation and please do not rely merely on this information.

p/s: The good thing about this is that thalassaemia protects you from malaria, which is why it is more prevalent in the area where malaria is endemic - people with this condition survive malaria.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008


but you are my mum every single second xxx

Mother's Day

Tertanam naluri keibuan amat mendalam
Di jiwa insan yang mendambakan kebahagiaan
Oh... ibu

Di bahumu tergalas beban
Perjalananmu penuh rintangan
Kau titipkan kasih sayang
Sejujur pengorbanan
Tak ku nafikan

Di saat kita berjauhan
Rasa ingin ku berlari
Mendakapimu penuh girang
Bak si kecil kehilangan

Kau insan penyayang
Betapa ku merindu
Lembutnya belaian ibu
Membuatku terlena

Di wajah terlukis tenang
Debar di dada kau rahsiakan
Ku pastikan dikau aman
Dikurnia sejahtera
Tak ku lupakan

Di saat kita berjauhan
Rasa ingin ku berlari
Mendakapimu penuh girang
Bak si kecil kehilangan

Tiada aku tanpa ibu
Hanya (kau) satu didunia
Bertakhta dikau dijiwaku
Kau lah ibu yang tercinta

Kau insan pengasih
Betapa aku mengharap
Hadirnya restumu ibu
Membawaku ke syurga

Bersemi belaian kasih sayang nan berpanjangan
Darimu insan yang mendoakan kebahagiaan anak-anakmu
Oh... Ibu

oleh: Hijjaz

Tuesday, May 06, 2008


It is always difficult to admit that we did something wrong, but I believe it is one best solution for our own motivation to be a better person. After all, Islam teaches us to be "husnudzon" (think positive about other people). You don't blame people, you find out what you can improve.

Anyway. It is even difficult when you have done something wrong and nobody ever let you know that. Then you end up thinking that you are always right.

It is difficult, as difficult as admitting that you do think that you like someone, even when people around you keep demanding that yes-i-do-like-that-person words of confession.

And of course the most difficult ones are to try to change yourself, your attitude, and your feelings, because it is just you - although this is not a really valid excuse - say if you are a muslim, you can't just go tell people I can't stop drinking alcohol because "it is just me".

And I have to disagree that you should do those changes just to make sure everybody likes you, because in real life, again, it is difficult to happen. You are a shy person, outspoken people do not get along with you. You then change and practise yourself to be very talkative, then it will be a challenge to sit with quiet people. Even Rasulullah s.a.w. who is the best human being, best one loved by Allah - still not everyone like him, even until now. As long as what you do is what would lift you up besides Him, nothing else should matter, should it? And this is exactly why we need to always remind ourselves about the purpose of life. Spending too much time thinking about what other people think about you would just waste your time, especially when you have too many other things to achieve in your life.

I don't know where am I going with this post, but I will end it up by telling you one stupid or maybe ?'good' thing that I did. Heheh I signed up for an ophthalmology prize award exams a few months ago - it is not compulsory of course and I am not looking forward to win anything, but I just thought I'd urged myself to do some readings - which of course will benefit me as the ultimate goal - so I signed up for it. But I haven't done the readings, and now I can't help thinking what have I done!!! aaaa....The test will be tomorrow,and trust me, I do not even know the anatomy of an eye.

Ok, thought Id write something up before starting my quick one day revision on ophthalmology. =P

p/s: It will be negatively marked!!!!!!!!!!!! hope i wont leave too many blank answers. DIFFICULT!

Wednesday, April 23, 2008


Bible version of Fitna?

"It is easy to take any parts of any Holy book that are out of content and make it sound like the most inhuman book ever written. This is what Geert Wilders did to gather more supporters to his hateful ideology. To create S.C.H.I.S.M."

A metaphoric reply to Fitna film?

JEDDAH, 10 April 2008 - A Saudi blogger has made a six-minute video entitled "Schism" by portraying texts from Christian sources out of context, similar to the way Dutch MP Geert Wilders made his recently-released anti-Qur'an film entitled "Fitna."

In his film, Raid Al-Saeed, 33, shows verses of the Bible that call for war and illustrated them with clips of extremist Christian groups that preach violence.

"I made it in less than 24 hours. In 'Schism,' I have used the same methodology that Wilders has used and that involves taking texts out of context," he told Arab News, adding that he made the film to prove that it is incorrect to judge Islam by watching "Fitna."

This is a point that he writes at the end of his short film. "It is easy to take part of any holy book out of context and make it sound like an inhumane book. This is what Geert Wilders did to gather supporters for his hateful ideology. To create 'Schism,'" he wrote.

Al-Saeed does not believe religious books call for violence and bloodshed. He said "Fitna" is "based on hate" and that Wilders has abused the "freedom of expression that he enjoys." He added that Wilders' movie reflects "his racism and hatred."

When Al-Saeed first posted his clip on YouTube on March 1, the video was removed within 12 hours with a message from the site that the clip violated its terms.

Al-Saeed wrote back to YouTube, asking why the movie was removed while "Fitna" remained available. He uploaded the film again and added a message for the site's administrators advising them to view Wilders' film before deleting the film.

His video has been viewed over 1,800 times and has been on YouTube since March 2. It is also available for viewing on Google.

Al-Saeed insists that his aim is not to spread hate but to tell the world that you cannot judge a religion or an ideology by taking things out of context.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008


I first used to watch House MD in my second year, when in our study group, one of us mentioned it helped him to memorise the clinical presentation of a certain disease due to watching the TV series. But watching it at that time put me off really so I stopped watching it. All it did was giving me headache - House and his team do the differentials too quick, I could hardly pick it up.

Then after a year, I started watching it again, and it does make more sense now, although most of the time, I do feel left behind. And it still is giving me headache every time I watch it. I do not know why I am stuck with it, but I am now on season 3. (it's season 4 on telly now)

There are times I enjoy his arguments with his colleagues or with his patients. But some other times, I do not agree a lot with Dr House particularly when he talks about his belief upon the non-existence of God.

Just a quote from the episode I have just finished watching:

[situation: a patient was asking House to talk about anything]

House: If we talk about anything, nothing will change.

Patient: It might.

House: How?

Patient: Time. Time changes everything.

House: That's what people say. It's not true. Doing things changes things. Not doing things leaves things exactly where they were.

There is always something to learn, be it the medical aspect or not.

Monday, April 07, 2008


I know I am a bit lag behind with this entry. But I just need to write something about it. I am sure loads and loads of people have already stated their comments - just look at the comments following the short movie when you youtube it.

Of course, there are just too many people, each with unique characteristic and personality, each with different belief and way they act... so there are just too many comments with the use of variety of languages which sometimes are very offensive.

As there has been lots of articles regarding this, I would not like to comment much. I just hope that people out there who never knew about Islam before, please do not depend merely on the movie as your sole source to get to know what Islam is about. I have to agree that some people do take only part of the verses - which is just not right. The Holy Quran comes as a whole and the message should be taken as a whole. Taking just one verse at a time and translating it literally, without knowing the reason behind the revelation of the verse (asbabun nuzul) and without understanding it fully, or without justifying it with other related verses in the Quran - this is just not right. Some people just have the tendency to do so. Let alone those who want to destroy Islam or who are Islamophobic, even some muslims have the tendency to do so for whatever reason. And please do not blame Islam if there are some of its followers who did not practise the right Islam as a whole. And please please please talk to people who really know about Islam than to listen to those who don't.

Whatever the intention of the film Fitna is, I just hope that it is for the best. We, muslims, have a right to be angry because it is an obvious insult to the religion. But I am calling for all muslims to be angry in a right way. This short film might just be a provocation towards the muslims. When we get angry too much, and start acting beyond the way we are supposed to - it is as if they have won. They win the viewers belief that Islam is really about killing people. That Islam is not a religion of piece as it should be.

As I said, I just hope that this is for the best. Maybe it is a warning for us muslims, to check whether we have done our best to do dakwah. Maybe it is a blessing when people heard about this, they tend to find out more about Islam. Who knows?

Below are two of my favourite links that I always go to, and they both commented about the film Fitna.

1. Saifulislam: Fitnah filem Fitna!
2. UZAR: Isu filem Fitna: Wajar boikot atau tidak?

"The Holy Quran also says: And kill them wherever you find them, and drive them out of the place where they drove you out; for persecution is worse than killing"

"You forgot the first part of that verse brother. Fight in God's cause against those who fight you. But do not commit aggression. God does not love aggressions. There are many who are seeking god but instead end up following the devil"

"The greatest jihad is to fight the evil within yourself"


Are they both the same?

Ok. I know this is pretty weird that I am going to post something regarding these two reptiles. It just occurred that while my friends and I played a game which I will name as "who am I" on the animal theme, Chikita needed to guess alligator - which was fairly tricky because you won't normally go anywhere near alligator, when you had wrongly guess crocodile... They both seem the same, so we all had arguments whether alligator and crocodile are just the same.

We played the game when we were spending four days of our easter break in Northern Ireland - to be more specific at Giant's Causeway. Apparently it is widely known as the 8th wonder of the world (I just knew this) for its basalt columns but I have to say it is worth going there for the breathtaking view, subhanallah.

The Giant's Causeway. More pictures from the trip - click here.

So what are the differences between alligator and crocodile?

1. They come from different families of crocodylians; alligators from alligatoridae, and "true" crocodiles from crocodylidae.

2. Alligators (?commonly) found in the southern US and eastern China while crocodiles are (?commonly) found in Mexico, south and central America, Africa, South East Asia, and Australia - so it is crocodile that I must have come across, at the zoo, most probably.

3. Habitat - They both inhabit the grassy swamps and slow moving rivers. Both of them have special salt glands to get rid of excess salt, but these work less well in alligators so they prefer freshwater habitats, whereas crocodiles tend to live in saltwater habitats.

3. Shape of the jaw Alligators tend to have wide, U-shaped, rounded snouts, while crocodiles tend to have longer, more pointed, V-shaped snouts.

4. Placement of teeth - Upper jaw is wider than lower jaw in alligators so the teeth in lower jaw are almost completely covered up - unlike in crocodiles, in which the 4th teeth stick up over the upper lip.
*references and more info: 1, 2

One lesson I learned while playing the game. I suck at geography and other general knowledge! I admit that I do not read that much.

Also a lesson from the alligator-crocodile argument; how powerful Allah is to have created so many different range of creatures.

Thursday, March 27, 2008


Today is mama's birthday. I am sure things are changing a lot for her, particularly in the future. To name a couple; she is expecting her first grandson; and my sister has just finished her SPM so she is not going to be living at home during her term time anymore once she gets into college, so mama will be left with papa, it is all going back to where it started. All her children are walking towards having their own lives, believe it or not. Ouh, and one more thing, she is retiring soon.

Time flies really fast. Sooner or later the family cycle will go on and on with time and it is a vicious cycle that will last forever as long as human being agrees that one of the purpose of life is for the progeny. If they do not reproduce, they know they will eventually die, every living creature does.

I remember an informal discussion my CIDR group was having when I was in my third year, where they were talking about not wanting to get old and the preference to die in dignity. It seemed being old and becoming a burden to other people are the least things they would hope for, that they had preferred to die if they have the option to choose. Of course, who would like to be old, but I'd personally be afraid of dying more than anything else.

In surah al-Munafiquun, Allah warns us not to forget Him when we are busy with the wealth and our kids. And whoever does so, they will be grouped as the losers. And people will bargain to have their life extended before the death came so that they will have more chance to do good deeds. But again, He warns that our death shall not be postponed, not even for a single second and that He knows what we have all done.

"Tidak akan lepas kedua kaki anak Adam di akhirat di hadapan Allah, kecuali selepas ditanya lima perkara; tentang umurnya di mana ia habiskannya, tentang kepemudaan dan kepemudiannya di mana ia digunakan, dan tentang hartanya dari mana datangnya dan ke mana dibelanjakannya, dan apakah yang dilakukan dengan ilmunya."
[hadith riwayat Tarmizi]

I have to agree that it is scary how quick the time has flies, and that makes me being alive on this earth for 24 years in just after a couple of months time. If just few months back, I'd referred myself as Iffa while talking to even juniors, I've just realised I have been using the term "kak Iffa" or "akak" more often lately. Duh, you really are getting old Iffa!

Sitting in the clinics while I was doing dermatology, I had mostly the elderly coming into the clinics. Most of the time, they come as a couple who happened to be so sweet even at their old age. It seemed like they understand and care about each other so much.

I guess in the end, I do not really mind, in fact I do want to, growing old and have my own family who cares for me and who has the same understanding of what the purpose of live is; and spending the time left in my life wisely enough as a mu'min, not merely human being with nothing to make themselves special in His view.

"Sebaik-baik manusia diantaramu adalah yang paling banyak manfaatnya bagi orang lain"
(HR Bukhari)

Growing old is inevitable, but making the most of the time we have left is something that we are able to decide.

p/s: I was looking for a verse from the Quran, which differentiate those who stay at home and who go out to spread the good to other people but to no avail. Can somebody enlighten me which verse it is please?

Tuesday, March 11, 2008


There were days when I missed being a kid again - especially that being an adult seems too difficult at times. Too many thinking and decisions to make.

There were days when I missed being in Malaysia.

There were days when I missed my family - especially when I rang them, finding out they were all gathering at my bro's house; playing with that cute growing up Damia, me niece.

Today is the day I miss my late grandfather. I do not know why I suddenly feel his loss. Not that I was so close to him, but I guess with me being able to do some thinking now, much better than when I was too immature before when he was still alive - it is just sad thinking of me not to be able to have some chat with him anymore. Not to be able to ask him for advice. Not to be able to ask him stories I would want to know more now. Like the Memali incident - which I am sure he would have had a good one for me. Or like the history of Malaya before the independence (I can recall him telling me these before). Or the general history. Or anything else. Any general or personal stuff. And advice. Good advice from a grandpa. A pious grandpa.

I just miss him. We surely do share one common thing. That is one thing for sure, definitely.

And of course I miss my late grandmother too. As she was the best granny ever.

May Allah bless them. Ameen.

Friday, March 07, 2008


Thank Allah, I have finally submitted my poster this morning. I have actually completed both the abstract and poster last month. It was such a stressful task back then when I had only two days to finish every different types of report and presentation for my audit. Just relieved I had finished it earlier. Except I was having 'trouble' choosing the right colour for these past few days. Maroon vs green. Well it was not that it matters that much, but just because I have made the poster available in both colour, it was just getting me confused - then I needed to make a choice. And I ended up uploading the maroon one so far - still have time to change it.

Choosing. When we have to make a choice, we would normally choose what will benefit us the most. And what benefits us the most largely depends on how we perceive things. When one might perceive having huge expensive buildings is an important marker of development, another person might see the moral development being far more important than that. These perceptions, I suppose are influenced by religion, background, environment, experience etc.

Anyway, I have been reading the news and articles (from different sources, and again it is entirely up to us to choose which one is true and which one is not), I believe what I can call as campaigns for the national election which is only two days ahead. Yes, only two days ahead. And I was touched by an email sent to the Newcastle Balai mailinglist...

Dlm keadaan pilihanraya di M'sia yg semakin hampir dan bahang2 nya boleh dirasakan sehingga lah ke bumi UK yg sejuk ni :-) ... maka saya di sini suka utk mengingatkan rakan2 sekalian utk kita sama2 berdoa bhw pilihanraya di M'sia ni akan memberi kemenangan kpd pihak yg benar2 ikhlas dan inginkan kebaikan buat M'sia dan rakyat nya iA... Semoga kepimpinan itu diberikan oleh Allah swt kpd mereka yg benar2 berhak memilikinya, yang boleh memberikan kemakmuran, keadilan dan kebahagiaan yg berkekalan kpd rakyat M'sia dunia dan akhirat iA...

Kesedaran rakyat juga sangatlah penting di sini utk menentukan pemimpin mana yg selayaknya diberikan kekuasaan krn ianya sememangnya akan memberi implikasi yg besar kpd kehidupan seharian mereka, anak2 cucu dan seterusnya.. . Jadi kita rakyat M'sia yg berada di UK ni, yang mungkin susah utk terlibat dlm proses pengudian yg berlaku di M'sia masih juga boleh sama2 'menyumbang' dgn doa2 kita iA... Dlm hari-hari yg terakhir, menuju ke p/raya ni, sama2 lah kita doakan yg terbaik... a famous saying I once heard... "Do not underestimate the power of du'a..."

Aye, never underestimate the power of doa.

Read critically. Choose wisely. Pray for the best, insyaAllah.

Selamat mengundi. (pakat kelik ngundi bijok2 belako neh).

Sunday, March 02, 2008



Like I said, macam-macam lah sekarang ni dah dekat nak pilihanraya. Anyway, these videos are hilarious, man. Click here.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

HOT 2008

I rang my mum few days back and one of the sentence she said was...

"lame Pah dok update blogspot tu"

Hehe, so that was a huge encouragement to update this after a while keeping myself busy (more or less pretending to) from updating this blog. And what comes in hand with the encouragement is the hot issue of national election 2008 in my beloved country.

That's right. Malaysia is to hold an early general election on the 8th of March, after our PM, Pak Lah dissolved the parliament just few days back, ending his term earlier, which was to expire in 2009. So that's more than a year ahead of the schedule. Whatever his plans are, only He and Allah know.

I am not that much into politics as compared to others, but I believe what happens in the country is for everyone of us to care about, and it is us who has the right to determine who to govern and on top of everything, opting for the right ruler and leader is a very important aspect in Islam itself. Government and citizen relationship comes in both ways. We vote for who we think would serve us right while government gets support from citizen to help running the country.

To be a leader is not to gain benefits and wealth from it, but to see it as a responsibility. Pemimpin itu selangkah kaki ke syurga dan selangkah ke neraka. That is why we wish both congratulation and sorry for someone when s/he is elected as a leader. Congratulation for being chosen by Allah to be a leader who will have the great opportunity to serve and make good change to gain His blessings. And sorry for all the burden that one has to go on with, in particular the burden of being questioned later on in the akhirat whether justice had been done or not.

With a very superficial knowledge and critical thought in politics that I have, I am not to comment much on this topic then... but to urge all of us to think wisely and critically before we vote.

1. The candidates
2. Macam-macam la bila pilihanraya ni. Isu orang utan
3. Never really seek for non Malays opinion about election before, but had brief discussions with few people I know here, and have been reading few websites. Check this one out: Jed Yoong, an individual journalist
4. Expert leadership needed. “Yes, religion is important, but there is no point talking about religion when you cannot develop the people and the state". Hmm? Totally agree that the "E.X.P.E.R.T.S." should lead.
5. Recognisation of shariah law by the Archbishop of Canterbury (although its not fully agreed but there's take home message from the video) - hmm... one question I do sometimes wonder: Why are muslims so scared to debate and question shariah law? He's right he's not a muslim to answer that, so ask yourself o muslims.

“Sesungguhnya Allah menyuruh kamu memberikan amanah kepada yang berhak menerimanya dan apabila kamu berhukum di kalangan manusia maka hendaklah kamu berhukum dengan adil. Sesungguhnya Allah memberikan pengajaran yang sebaik-baiknya kepadamu.”
(Surah an-Nisa’ ayat 58)

(wish I could vote, but for whatever reason, I had some issues with the registration) =(