Sunday, March 27, 2005


Am waiting for Kak Umi and her husband, and their cute little lad, Huzaifah Aiman. It is Sunday, and they are going to give me and Dila(my housemate) a lift to Blaydon Carboot sale. This is going to be my 2nd time going to carboot.

Today is my mom's birthday, and I haven't yet give her a call. Don't think she'll be at home at this time. Well, have to remember of deducting less hour to call Malaysia from today coz the Europian summer time has begun, so now the time here will be 7 hours later than that in Malaysia, instead of 8 hours.

I won't say anything about gifts or wutsoever I am sending to my mom, briefly coz I am not sending her anything. Yes, that's rite. I remember one controversial issue arose when I was in college about ringing ur mum during the mother's day (tapi x ingat apesal laa kontroversi sangat). For me, it depends on how your mum expect you to do something on days that they regard as special. Say your mum would be heartbroken if you do not give them gift, then it would be better to do what she prefers, rite? But some mothers do not bother that much about their children getting them gifts, a call would be enough, and perhaps some mothers do not even realise the existence of those special days (only one that I can relate here, actually - mother's day). Ask yourselves and you will get the answer. I mean, we know our own mother don't we? I hav a friend whose siblings (including her) always give their mother presents or cards (at least) during the mother's day, so it will be kinda weird if they stop doing that. Who knows how her mum is gonna react if she or one of her siblings does not give her present. The most important point here is to be nice to our mum, to please them. As for me, sometimes I just happened to bought my mum things, and I got this sentence from her "dakyoh laa susoh2 beli barang....mahal pulok tuh. Perabih duit je". Alaa...kalo xabeskan duit beli barang untuk mak, habis jugak duit tuh beli benda merepek2, ye dak? (so baik beli sumthing utk mak). Although she said that, I could see the sense of being appreciated in her face when we(me or my sis) gave her presents, no matter how kodi they are...

Hehe...just back from carboot. Tadi stop kejap sebab Kak Umi dah sampai. Now I have no idea what I was getting to before. I have also just called my beloved mama, and we spent more time talking about some news back in Malaysia and my trip to Paris in the next 2 days. And as usual, she asked me about my studies. I always expect that everytime I call her =). Talking about mothers... they are so special. Islam pon dah naikkan martabat wanita yang bergelar ibu. "Syurga itu di bawah telapak kaki ibu".

Penat mak kita mengandungkan kita, pastuh mase baby asyik nangis sampai laa besar suke merengek nak itu, nak ini, tapi mak jage jugak dengan penuh kasih sayang. Kalo mak tak bagi kita buat ape2 sebab die sayang kat kita, kita cakap mak tak sayang pulak. Hantar sekolah, masak nasi, beri makan, semue mak yang buat...susahnye anak nak tolong mak. Kadang2 mak mintak tolong buat keje sket pon merengek. Isk3...astaghfirullahal'azim, mudah2 an kita elakkan laa mende2 camnih. Tak cukup tuh, bile dah besar, nanti nak kahwin, manelaa tau mak tak berkenan calon isteri yang dibawak balik rumah, tapi nak bagi chance kat anak, jumpe dulu. Tengok baik ke tak. Bukan ape, takut nanti tak pandai jalankan tanggungjawab sebagai isteri solehah. Kalo before kahwin suh pakai tudung, cakap nak pakai lepas kahwin. Sebenarnya, bukannya pandang hina sangat kalo x pakai tudung nih, tapi itukan suruhan Allah. Lagi satu bukannye tau mati lepas kahwin ke before. Bimbang jugak lepas kahwin nanti degil plak, takpasal2 anak die plak kene tanggung dosa si isteri. Isk3...kene fikir lagi, nak bagi ke taknak. Ari tuh sibuk tanye bile anak nak kahwin, skang anak dah bawa balik calon, tak kenan la plak. Nanti tak bagi kahwin, kot2 laa lagi memudaratkan. Berdoa je laa mudah2an tuhan tunjukkan jalan yang terbaik. Sebab Allah Maha Mengetahui mana yang terbaik untuk hamba-Nya.

Huhu...tibe2 buat karangan plak. Takde keje. Tapi tulaa...pengajarannya: Marilah kita same2 sedar setiap saat betapa sayangnya mak kita kat kita. Nak balas jasa derg memang tak mampu, sekurang2nya janganla bebankan derg lagi (alamak, lepas nih, nak mintak beli laptop...camne nih? Tak beban kot ek <---inilaa anak...tak habes2 mintak itu ini). Cukuplaa masuk labour room takpon, tengok dalam tv je of a mother giving birth to her baby...MasyaAllah, besarnye pengorbanan mak. Teringat satu kisah (tak ingat zaman mane), yang ade sorang budak mendukung bapak die. Lepas tuh ade orang tanye kenapa dukung bapak die. Budak tuh cakap sebab mase kecik, die sakit, bapak die gendong die cari ubat. Ke camne ntah...lebey kurang arr... Tapi budak tuh cakap jugak, walaupon buat same cam ape yang bapak die buat, die still tak buleh balas jase bapak die, sebab kalo bapak die dulu sure harap die slalu sihat, tapi dalam hati si anak mesti ade rase terbeban dengan kehadiran ayah yang sakit uzur dan perlukan bantuan. Mehlaa kite same2 sedar pasni.

Actually, tengah nervous nak pegi Paris lusa. Better get ready, packing up things, and make sure all tickets and important documents and wutsoever tak tertinggal. Bus to london will be at 6.15 a.m. (hhuuhu, awalnye) on Tuesday. Adrenaline is rushing through my nerves... Can't wait to see my good frens and spend the holidays with em. Hopefully, everything will be fine. Hopefully, everything will turn out as wut we planned. Ameen...

Friday, March 25, 2005


Had a chat with a junior from my secondary school a few nights ago (though I never met him before). in history. One, coz I am not there anymore. Two, coz the new name is SMKAKA. No more KARA. MISS my frens, dormates, classmates, teachers, and the school itself... I have had an enjoyable and fun time there.

Rite now reflecting those times when I was in SMKARA... Why didn't I use it wisely to learn more about Islam? About history? Having been in a SMKA ie islamic school should have given me the most valuable things to learn: ISLAM - if only I have grabbed all those oppurtunities, but sad to say, I don't think I did. All I did was studying, answering ppl questions, sitting for some 'duniawi' tests, dipping myself with quizzes, having fun with my frens (or more particular 'geng'), enjoying trips to there and there, boycotting the canteen - although I can't help getting me goreng pisang yang sedap bangat tuh especially kalo tambah sos, and nasi lemak was irresistable as well (wut an unforgettable memory ever) and...etc. I am not regretting those times, it was fun...but wouldn't it be more nice if I concentrate more on my islamic knowledge, not only based on the syllabus, but based on wut we as muslims should know.

If only I could repeat all those times...but the fact is I can't. All I have now is my present life which I have to move on with, and my future, yet to be determined. And for reminder, especially to me myself, we are all here for one reason. Check the holy Quran [51;56]

وَمَا خَلَقْتُ الْجِنَّ وَالْإِنسَ إِلَّا لِيَعْبُدُونِ

I created the jinn and humankind only that they might worship Me

A bit of quote from my fren's blog which is very meaningful: "Apa pun kita usaha, segala ape yg berlaku atas kita dah ditentukan Allah. Kita berusaha sedaya upaya hanya kerana ingin melakukan ibadah yg terbaik dalam ibadah kita. Tanpa mengharapkan apa2 dr usaha yg kita lakukan. Itulah ibadah yg sebenar2nya.." (from wan aisyah wan muda <--kene tulis satgi jadi plagiarism plak, hehe).

So why not we do everything lillahita'ala...whoever we are, where ever we go, and wutever we do... at least all things we do will be regarded as ibadah, selagi tak langgar hukum syarak. Wallahualam.

Saturday, March 19, 2005



1. Submitted my assignment 3: literature search and critical appraisal.

I have NO idea what I submitted in, but at least it's gone! I actually tried to complete it before wednesday at 5 coz my housemate gave me a ticket to International Night at Northumbria University (though they didn't even check the ticket). Then the next day (which was yesterday), didn't have 9 o'clock lecture, but went quite early, just to print out everything and submit it a.s.a.p. BUT I only realised I didn't bring the disclaimer and front page of the assignment after I finished printing all of them out!!! And that was about 10 minutes before my DR session- too late to ask Ija to bring it from home. So after DR went back home, get the sheets, went back to school, and stapled them together and finally...there I was, at Porter's Lodge with 3 copies of assignment 3, putting them all into the box...relieved!!!!!! No more assignment 3 =) Hope it turns out ok.

2. Had a social dinner with my groupmates last night. It was great =)

Had it at Scalini's (an Italian restaurant) from 6 to 10(for me n Lara - most of them went to a bar afterwards and only went back at half one!-->which of coz no need to mention why don't I join em). I turned up a bit later by the way, coz maghrib started at 6.15 pm yesterday, so prayed first at the muslim welfare house, then went there, firstly based on Oniye's map, then kinda lost, but Lara's map kept me on the right track. Good teamwork there. Claire n Lara ordered me a vege pizza. It was so large - but food n me?? Irresistable! Can't believe I ate it on my own, alone... except I didn't finish half of it's (kinda) crispy edge. I wanted to finish it. I knew I still have some space in my lesser sac, but I felt so tired chewing it, plus I was so sick to be sitting in front of the computer continuously for quite a few days b4(for the assignment of course), not to mention , as wut I just told, I went back home just for the sake of getting those sheets (it was about 40minutes to n from).

I was so tired, if they didn't make this plan, I would have probably been sleeping on my purple bed, covered by me duvey, with the electric underblanket keeping me warm.... that would be nice but I can always do that later (like, after I finish updating my blog, probably =P), and I kinda like the idea too - it did make me feel the sense of belonging though I didn't really go around and talk with all of them... I wish I had the chance, and can't describe how I wish my English is much much better (itulaa dulu xnak blaja betul2, malas membace, huhu...and again, probably beyond my confidence level<---sure Mr Zaidi marah lagi). I know it will always be my fault, my weakness if i don't get over it. But hopefully time will erase all that. (and that's why I'm writing in English - forgive me if i am grammatically wrong, and perhaps u guys shud correct me coz that's the rite way of learning isn't it?) Well, at least I ended up with a great conversation with Claire and Lara after most of them went to a bar nearby. Cheers guys, I was so relieved talking to u guys. And thanx for being so helpful. I was so glad, and I still am. It feels so good to know other people would like to help you. And most of all, thanks to the Almighty God to have grouped me with all these great people and open their heart, hope it will turn out ok sooner. Group 11 rawks!! Eheh, lame tak dengar perkataan tuh. (more pics here)

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(missing: Bella)

3. It's holidays!!! Can hardly wait to meet Aisyah, Asma' n Hajar, and be a crazy us again. And of coz looking forward going to Paris with them. Well, save that for another entry.

4. I had a yogurt ...nyummy..nyummy...(summer biopot: mango, papaya & passion fruit - trust me, i don't get any money to promote this) and now I am eating an apple!! No...not food again!! (but at least I eat healthy food, do i?) By the way did I mention I eat vege now??Did I?? A thing to be proud of ;D

5. Malaysian night was great. Thought not much people coming, but amazingly, all tickets were sold out, and some people still came to buy the ticket at the door. I feel sorry for them, I wish they could join it. If only the place was much bigger.... Anyway, the best part is (not really the best part, coz it's kind of controversial) I happened to be the grand prize lucky draw winner!! Yup! Won a trip to Europe with Kelana Convoy. It's worth £429. Wow! xpenah2 dapat lucky draw, and suddenly... almost equivalent to RM 3000!


Wednesday, March 09, 2005


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Comel tak Fahim???

He's 2 years old now!! Went to his birthday party last saturday, had a really nice time kat rumah Kak Dila n Kak Muazah, 2 happy go lucky and very informative sisters (Wut i mean by sisters here is sister ie blood relationship). Scroll down and have a guess which ones are them. Senang gile nak cari, muke sebiji same. I had always mistaken Kak Dila with Kak Muazah. They are so like twins!! Sebbaik sorang dah pakai braces, at least senang sket nak cam. hehe... Sori yer, akak2, mengumpat sket lam blog. Anyway, don't really hav time to update this blog, but can't help myself to copy these pics... if I don't do this now, I will probably never upload these cute pics of cute n innocent little children. No words needed, a picture worth thousands of words rite??( this might be the longest entry so far =P)

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For more pictures, can go to Kak Muazah's fotopages by clicking here